Lessons Of Motherhood
The education of motherhood is a tireless journey. It takes no vacations, it doesn’t sleep, and it never stops. Sometimes I feel like a boat on the waters of motherhood - we have our calm times, a few big storms, some rolling waves and sometimes an all out tidal wave. The various conditions come and go as quickly as the waves to the shore and just as constant too.
Take the last 15 minutes for example. We’re sitting down for a nice family dinner. Dad cooked ribs and mom added some mixed veggies and stuffing to round it out. My 4 year old son is a real stinker about eating. He’ll eat almost any meat as long as it’s solo on the plate - and it’s all he’ll eat. He dug into the ribs with no problem, but when mom insisted that he eat some veggies (you see she’d determined he was old enough for mom to start pushing the issue) the resistance was instant and swift. Mom held her ground. She told him he couldn’t get up from the table until he ate the four small carrot slices dad put on his plate.
“I no like them” was the repeated response.
Mom’s retort, “I didn’t ask if you liked them, I told you you had to eat them.”
Reluctantly he put the first one in his mouth. Mom smiles enjoying her victory. The boy responds by making the most terrible facial expressions while chewing to ensure no question of his misery. Mom and dad were trying hard not to show their fits of laughter inside. (Incidentally, this is one of the hardest parts of parenthood for which is there is no adequate training or warning.) Just as mom was about to tell him not to make such a big deal out of it he started gagging. The next thing he shared was a stream of puke onto his lap.
Sister screams and declares the gross factor - because clearly she is under the assumption an announcement was necessary and beneficial to all present. Dad tells her THAT doesn’t help and proceeds to undress the boy. Mom starts with the dreaded cleaning task and wisely gives a quick word of warning to the girl that this is clearly not funny and any attempts to repeat it would be a bad idea. (Mom knows her daughter.)
Sister gives a sly smile which brings on an addition from dad, “And besides, when you’re big enough you have to clean up your own mess.”
This brought on a wave of indignation with her questioning if she now would have to clean up her own throw up if she got sick. To which mom replies affirmative and explains that it’s why we make it to the toilet when we get older.
The boy throws in the final jab before leaving the table to wash his hands:
“I told you the carrots make me puke.”
Dad eeks out a snort of laughter before getting it under control. Mom attempts at damage control by pointing out it’s not the carrots that made him puke but rather his dramatic gagging ploy. But this battle is already lost.
Moments later the girl pipes up:
“Mom you, should SO blog this.”
Mom looks at dad and says that clearly if her 9 year old daughter responds with instruction to “blog this” mom spends too much time blogging. Dad laughs and says it’s true. Then mom says the fitting end would be for dad to blog the fact that the 9 year old would tell her mom to blog as obviously her job is to blog the puking incident.
And there you have it folks. Lesson #1 - Don’t force your kid to eat their veggies unless you want to clean up puke. Lesson #2 - Never think for a moment you’re not spending too much time blogging.
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Caught your response over at An Island life and came to check out your blog. Now I am leaving a comment b/c we lived through this and my youngest (now 13, taller than me) still hears how he used to say “Cucumbers give me a headache” and there was one time where he was sent upstairs and spent 10 minutes telling us why he hated string beans. Even now when I feed them a different vegetable, I get eeeeeuuuu comments, like baked sweet potatoes.
But back to your story, is it possible that your son may have an issue with textures? That was the problem with my youngest.
Like your blog, nice, crisp colors!
ROFL - highly probable on the textures with him, but it’s nice to hear other battle stories too! Thanks for dropping by!
Comment by Jen — March 25, 2007 @ 6:46 pm
Yes, it’s really hard to win the battle when the kiddo does something that makes you want to laugh. I try not to laugh, but I can’t help myself. This of course makes my wife mad and then I have to sit in the corner for a timeout.
ROFL - well, I’m as bad as dh about holding it together so we’d both be in the corner!!
Comment by Daddy Forever — March 25, 2007 @ 7:58 pm
You’re not going to believe me but the same thing happened to me, only I was the kid throwing up. Way back in kindergarten, I used to hide my veggies in my empty milk carton. One day the teacher caught me and tried to force me to eat them. I told her that I would get sick. She made me eat them anyway and I threw up all over her desk. Serves her right! LOL!
Smart girl to use the milk carton as the hiding place, I’m surprised the teacher looked there unless she caught you in the act. I remember being the one at the table being told I had to finish my crust of my sandwich before I could get down - how I hated that!
Comment by kailani — March 26, 2007 @ 12:17 am
HAHAHA! Great post! Bloggable moments — life is just a string of ‘em, huh?
And when we were kids, blog wasn’t even a word…
No it wasn’t - and we didn’t know what a microwave was yet or that the ability to record and watch movies or TV when you wanted was just a pipe dream! Life is a string of bloggable moments…I like that!
Comment by Pass the Torch — March 26, 2007 @ 5:11 am
[...] Holly, who is a regular Pass the Torch participant, gets my LOL award today, and also Pass the Pitchfork. Go read and you’ll see why. [...]
Pingback by Pass The Torch » Pass the Pitchfork — March 26, 2007 @ 5:21 am
I know now that I would have never gotten anythng done had there been blogging when I was a young mother.
Nothing gets down now, but at least I don’t have kids at home. Only a cat.
She yowls,
Here from Pass The Torch
It’s a big balancing act to be sure. My son is the pup that begs for the attention and my daughter is the cat that yowls and tries to keep everything on HER terms….LOL Thanks for dropping by.
Comment by Pamela — March 26, 2007 @ 6:59 am
Too funny! Your daughter is hilarious. Blog about it.
You read about ,y hubs and MIL teasing me about blogging from my new washer and dryer, right? *rolls eyes*
Yes I did and I love being surrounded by such great company that can relate!! Hope that new washer and dryer come immediately for you.
Comment by Mary (mert) — March 26, 2007 @ 8:47 am
Oh Holly! Our little boys are so much alike. My almost 4 year old is also a stinker about eating. He has only a few foods he will eat and I recently decided to expand his horizons too! The result….identical to yours! The only difference, my nine year old didn’t tell me to blog it! Funny how I had the answers to this before parenthood but now they escape me!
Oh that is so true about having all the answers BEFORE the experience. Funny how that happens. I remember well the time when I was certain I knew it all.
Comment by Wendy — March 26, 2007 @ 11:08 am