Well, Monday found me. Ready or not, it always finds me. It’s funny that time never gives you pause to catch up, you either speed run for a time to get back up with the moving line or you lag behind but the line keeps moving. This morning I had to speed read through my Google Reader because I can’t stand the thought of the number of new articles creeping up out of control. There were a ton I wanted to reply to but I have to keep on task. I hope I can make it back to them later.

One that struck me was Kelly’s post about scratching the month of April. Sometimes this is just the best option when you feel things didn’t go the way you’d hoped. You give yourself permission to let it go and refocus your energy on what lay ahead.

I have a break coming too, this weekend in fact. It’s been on the calendar since late January and I’m a little surprised it can already be here. I’m looking forward to a weekend getaway with my mom and sisters. My sweet hubby announced Saturday that “It’s time.” I joked with him that he was announcing my entrance of the infamous women’s club (yup the one that starts with a “B”). He’s a smart guy, so after pointing out that there are no issues with him he explains he’s noticed my tolerance for the kids and daily stuff is a wash of late. He also adds the postscript that after one weekend he’s on the edge and doesn’t know how I do it 24×7. He went with his brothers for a weekend of fun in January and came home telling me I had to do this because he didn’t even realize how needed it was. So now it’s my turn and you know what? I’m ready. I’m joining my friend Kelly with scrapping the last couple weeks and looking forward to a new day.

What do you do when you need a break?

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Family Relationships Motherhood Balance Blogging

This has been the refrain in my own head and that of my kids for the past several days. The final countdowns always seem to bring this phrase. The question is regarding school for all of us although the reasons are different. The kids have 19.5 days of school left after today. They’re ready to be done, I’m ready to be done. Last night’s hour of complicated math problems homework only reiterated the done factor. I have to say, I can remember still doing timed math facts tests in 5th grade. My daughter is in 3rd and was supposed to have them all mastered this year and last night had a packet of over 15 pages of multiplication problems the last three pages of which were all problems with answers in the thousands and ten thousands! I can’t wait to get her back in my clutches to spend some FUN time reviewing basics pressure free. The kids can’t wait to have some unrestricted play time, I can’t wait to have a break from it all and mornings with just me and my kids again.

It’s funny, when I watched Disney’s “Recess, School’s Out” movie I was struck by the memories of how anticipated and enjoyed summer vacation was for me as a kid. I loved the scene with the principal and the boy where the adult is the one acknowledging how important summer vacation is and shouldn’t be messed with because you grow too fast anyway. Summer vacation is a rite of childhood, it marks the end of a big accomplishment and start of fun. I remember so well that excitement and anticipation that neared the Christmas morning level. I like feeling any sense of that again. (Being reminded of these types of things is one of the best parts of being a parent for me.) Most importantly, it breaks up the monotony of life and schedules in a much needed way, kind of like the seasons for weather. This family is ready for summer now so are we done yet?

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Family Parenting Perspectives

How can this already have been 9 years ago?

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Yep, I should have but I didn’t. My son loves his preschool. The only time he cried when I left was this past January and I knew something was off. A trip to the doctor confirmed it - a double inner ear infection. So when he cried last week I should have known but I thought maybe it was just an off day as he hadn’t had any cold or anything. Well, this morning he came into my room crying at 6:30 with an ear ache. A trip to the doctor confirmed an ear infection in his left ear. Doc said it was nasty and was already starting to drain so not to freak out if I saw some yucky stuff coming from his ear.

Poor little tyke. He’s slept most of the day. I’m not getting anything done, including computer time but that’s okay too. How many days do you get to just be on the couch with your little one cuddling with you? These are the moments when you know you’re definitely a REAL mom.

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Most of my feelings and some fun shots of being a mom are summed up on my page on my life’s accomplishments. But this one was truly priceless:

We had decided after a 5 year wait for #2 that it wasn’t meant to be and closed our adoption file. Our nearly 5 year old daughter kept praying for that baby brother or sister. 3 days before her 5th birthday we were at the hospital for his birth, which we learned about only 3 days before. This picture was taken right after his first bath (which I got to give him in the hospital nursery). It was the first time Cidnie saw her new baby brother. She wanted so much to touch him through the glass. She couldn’t wait to get him home when she could hold him. This was the first time she held him and she calls this “Happy Tears” because mom was crying happy tears.

My journey to motherhood was an intense ride, but one I wouldn’t change for anything. The love, memories, miracles and growth were all worth it.

Go visit Karen for more special mom moments!

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….and I’m a sap. I have the hardest time saying no when it comes to help. I’ve already taken on two extra little girls in the mornings before/until school and today and tomorrow I’m watching a 1.5 and 3 year old from 8:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m.

It’s now noon and all I can say is I am 100% spoiled.
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Well yesterday was a long but very good day and it ended on the perfect note for me. Sanjaya finally went home. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a personal issue with the kid. I just hated seeing the level of the talent pool he was dog paddling in, watching the others swim circles around him yet they were the ones getting eliminated before him. It just wasn’t right. I know it’s American Idol and popularity is a huge factor but I’m glad for the other contestants that he finally went home.

Thanks to my brother in law (who I learned last night actually reads my blog), my house is clean today. A ton of little projects that have been building were eliminated yesterday in preparation for his coming to spend the night with us. Apparently it was the missing motivation for my getting things done. Thanks Ryan! I was actually excited to get up this morning because I knew I had a massive head start on the day and awaiting chaos.

The restoring balance continued in the yard too. My hubby replaced some necessary pool elements that have made a world of difference. It never ceases to amaze me when noticeable and large changes come about by small and simple things. We knew our pool vacuum was on its last leg. But I don’t think either of us understood the difference it would make to have one that really worked well again.
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In loving honor and memory of those lost this week.

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I’ve been contemplating this scripture the past couple days and after yesterday it seems even more meaningful to me:

1 Corinthians 13:2
“And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.”

It is amazing to me that even if one obtained complete faith to the point of moving mountains the same would still be nothing without charity. That pure love of God that shows no limits and no bounds. That godly compassion that allows us to step outside our box and love all those around us, even those - especially those - that are hard to love is essential to our achieving greatness.
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According to wikipedia Procrastination is the deferment or avoidance of an action or task to a later time and is often linked to perfectionism. Okay, who knew me when they wrote this?

I’m always sharing with others my view of the big wheel that goes round and round. It applies to everything I can think of. Sometimes you’re on top, others in front, sometimes squashed and a few rare times behind pushing it forward but the point is the wheel is always moving and you can’t stay in the same place 100% of the time. I seem to be in a season of running in front right now.

It’s interesting to note some important changes. As I’ve focused on simplifying and finding balance much has changed. I’m spending less time worrying about the little details and perfect to do lists in my head and that’s wonderful. I’m spending more time doing things for me than I used to - even learning how to say no occasionally. But I still struggle to let go of many of the old demons that would rob me. I’m constantly amazed at how hard it is to replace those old files in my computerized brain with new ones. The old files are worry and perfection.

My biggest challenge right now is the need to feel that I’m getting back in control and on top of my wheel for so many things. For example, Father Time has finally begun to take a noticeable toll on my physical nature. That metabolism that for years was set to super speed has now begun to slow. For the past year I’ve been saying I need to counter the changes with more exercise and better diet but the attempts have been feeble at best. Similarly the basics of household running are being accomplished but the detail projects, organizing and cleaning are remain undone and that’s starting to wear on my mind too. Then there’s the motherhood aspect which always leaves me wishing I were doing more consistently to be a better mom and raise the best kids. What’s a girl to do?

I’m trying to step back today and find a game plan to answer my question. I’ve got to find some solutions to motivation and goal reaching. Anyone have anything that’s really worked for them? I’m all ears.

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