…Just keep running around the board! That’s been my kind of week. I have so much I want to blog and no time to do it! Now the holiday weekend is here so I know I’m at least 3 days out from getting to any of it. But who can complain about a three day weekend?!

In the shorts of exciting news I became a blonde this week…no not mentally, physically. It was supposed to be a highlight retouch. Ummm….well….my daughter said it best:

“Whoa mom! What’d you do to your hair? It so does NOT look good, it is way too blonde.”

Here’s the past three day outlook:

This is the first time I’ve let someone else do color on me. I’ve always done my own. I was able to correct some of it last night - at least take down the golden yellow to a more blended light brown. Don’t you just love how the two tone comes out in the middle photo? Talk about a light and dark side…..LOL

See how much I’ve had to blog about and not a spare minute to be found….Argggg. Well, until Tuesday I wish everyone a happy and safe holiday weekend!

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[blenza_autolink ww]

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On the upside it’s great training material for what NOT to do if you’re the one being interviewed. *grin* Seriously, how much work was it for the host to keep composure after that?! W.O.W.

Well, I’m still out there searching for that ever elusive time that keeps getting away from me. Do you ever have those days when you have so much you want to get done and although you do get a lot done, you find yourself wishing it could have been more?

I finally had a day this week when I was able to be home for most of the day. I didn’t even get a Wordless Wednesday post up this week it’s been so crazy! This afternoon went to this project for a friend, as she needs it ready to go by Monday. Now I’m heading into the throngs of school projects that need to be turned in by tomorrow for the kids and dinner. I can’t believe it’s already 5:30 because I swear the last time I checked my computer clock it was only 2:30! I’m glad I was able to get so much done on the website for her, too bad I can’t flick a wand and duplicate the progress on my own! Maybe tomorrow. There’s always tomorrow right? *giggle*

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This post comes in continuation from last week’s post about blogging and traffic. Initially, I wanted to hold off posting anything on it until I was closer to “launch” but that’s a nasty trap I often fall into. The trap of holding off progress until something is already completed - or so near it that I feel I’m still in control. Which as you can guess feeds procrastination and all things self-defeating. So I’m repressing that inner voice and posting anyway! Besides, didn’t I just post something about the positive energy that flows from all things new?!

And what else should fall in my lap today but an invitation from another great blogger to boldly define some goals regarding my blogging? This can’t be coincidence as I’ve been defining, identifying and formulating my thoughts on this very topic for the past few weeks.

Here’s the skinny: I’m different. I didn’t come into blogging the way most do and not for the same reasons. It took me a few weeks to wrap my brain around a general theme and content for what I wanted to make happen. But when it did, it was golden - you know like that once in a blue moon, perfect fit feeling while trying on jeans. My initial goal in creating this blog was to pull my many projects and ideas into one place - to streamline my energies so I could maintain progress, focus and real life updates to much of what was gathering digital dust in my computer files. The answer to my question of what I’m REALLY good at was that I’m in the process of making my life a masterpiece. So the whole point of my blog and what I do here is to both continue that quest daily and to share what I’ve learned along the way. About half way through the life of the blog I did a major rework trying to bring focus to my purpose and diminish the loud background noise of blog related links on my side bar. I tied in some of my original header graphics into more organized and simple side bar navigation. Something worked because this comment was shared last week and it really made me feel good knowing that a trained eye caught the vision of my theme:

“Love this list - but have to say what a fantastic header, now that is what I call an Engaging Brand! Glad to find you via this list” - Anna Farmery

I felt a new pulse of encouragement and determination to keep up with this. (Thanks Anna!) So in the past couple of weeks I’ve been contemplating what my blog has grown into and what I want to do with it. I’ve had a few weeks of what I can only describe as some form of burnout where I’m actually trying to come up with something meaningful to post. That, of course, feeds the process of evaluating things which leads to review and adjusting if necessary. Then a quirky turn of events led me to finishing the article on meaningful traffic and everything snowballed in my mind. So here’s my new and upcoming direction - the many sides of Holly.

I realized last week while driving my son to school how we all have so many hats we wear and how few people get to see us in more than one or two at a time. For example, my book club ladies see the “Intellectual/reading Holly”, the hair clients see the “Beauty & Hairstyling Holly”, and so on. And then I realized how many sides of me I have been developing for my entire life. This is exactly what I was trying to pinpoint in finding what I’m really good at and in making my life a masterpiece. So the inspiration was to design and organize my blog into this pattern.

In the coming weeks I plan to transform the look of my blog to include another friendly navigation system that can point readers to areas of interest relating to my many sides. I will organize my blog articles in corresponding pages to those sides and each day I will share something in a post about one of those areas. This way I’ll be writing current content while tying in older materials and files all the while creating a digital copy of me and the masterpiece I’m working on becoming. I KNOW I won’t run out of content…*laugh* and hopefully I’ll reach that itch that’s been bugging me for so long too. Bingo…simple and balanced. *wink*

If you thought you knew me…pull up a chair because you’re about to see so much more of the real Holly by me sharing my many sides.

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I have a growing frustration about our educational standards in the United States today. I’ve voiced some of my concerns in the past. Today the fires of my frustration have been refueled.

I don’t want to be misunderstood so I’m starting with a point that I want to make crystal clear. I am in complete support of the goal this legislation was created for. I too believe that our educators need to be held accountable for teaching and that our youth benefit from the best education possible. What I strongly disagree with are the methods the act uses. And here’s my primary reason why: Common sense, development and individual needs should be the paramount considerations. Currently, they are secondary - if regarded at all.
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I’m excited about where I am on my blog. I’ve been reviewing where I was a year ago and I find that a year later I’m so closely aligned with this thought process and contemplation about my blog again that it’s almost spooky! I’ve been spending a great deal of time lately re-evaluated where I’m going, what I’ve done, what I’m doing and what I want to do with all of it…especially as it relates to this blog. I’m really looking forward to some of the ideas I’ve come up with. Now I just need time to blog and implement them.

I’m sitting here thinking, “It’s Monday. A new start to a new week.” And then I’m realizing how much power there is behind things new. Changes, big and small can have such a large impact on our lives. Our attitudes are largely defined by how we view things and so the energy that comes with the new factor can really work to our advantage.

How do you maximize the new energy in your life? What changes have had the greatest impact on you?

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A few days ago I shared a list that was going around of what is now being called the W-List. Tonight as I was out visiting one of the newest sites that I found linking back to me I read this wonderful comment from the list’s creator and I thought it was something that should be shared:

“First off, thank you for welcoming the list and all those talented authors and thinkers in your online home. If you’d like to see interests, Elysa (my new personal hero) classified the list that way here http://www.genpink.com.

Someone also created a wiki of the list here http://wmagicallist.wikispaces.com

I have been humbled by the gift of each contribution to this list. One person at a time, you have all told a story about your readings and passions through the list. Please keep the momentum going. Go ahead and reach out to these fabulous people, find reason to work on a co-authored post or project together. There is so much richness and talent on this list!

Valeria Maltoni”

I don’t know about you, but that kind of warm response just made me feel great and I felt like everyone should have a chance to know the kind of woman who is responsible for this connecting project.

Here’s the most recent list:
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When I first began blogging, I quickly learned the value of jotting down things as they hit me. So many times I’d think I’d be able to remember what I was going to blog or what links and resources I’d read that sparked an idea only to find that when I had the time to sit down all those things had long since been part of a brain flush. So I began to write a new post with a title at the minimum and hopefully a few trigger thoughts and/or links that had inspired the idea in the body so when I came back later I’d get the necessary memory triggers to finish it. This has worked really well for me. I share this with you because this post’s topic has been in my dashboard for articles for a year now. It is by far the oldest and sits alone as an article topic that has been floating around in my head for a great deal of time. My point is that I’ve put a dang lot of thought into it.
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It’s amazing to me how the connotation of simple words can evoke so many feelings and opinions. The whole wording affair is compounded in confusion when you roll in the concept of political correctness.

It’s nice that as a people we’re becoming more educated and aware of our language and choice of wording, generally speaking. The whole concept of being politically correct came about in an effort to encourage neutrality and inclusion in speech. I like that. I don’t like when the concept runs a muck and is taken to extremes, which seems to happen far too often.

But with all this said, there are some very important basic words that imply a great deal that ought not to be dismissed. One of these words is “real.” This little word has a deep and profound meaning and it should be used with care.

This morning my daughter said, “Mom I need you to help me explain to my friends again that you really are my REAL mom.”

The word real in front of mom has a powerful impact. Yes, I’m an adoptive parent, but I am very much a real parent. My road to becoming a mother wasn’t the traditional one but it was no less legitimate fraught with very real fears, pains, uncertainty and joy. It wasn’t thrust on me. It was my choice, something I decided I wanted to do. In the beginning it was mostly about me and my wants to become a mother. But it only took a New York minute to figure out when we adopted our daughter that it was anything but about me! It has been the most amazing and wonderful experience of my life. So naturally, I get a little defensive when someone tells me that what I am and what I’ve experienced isn’t real.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t get offended when people ask me who my daughter’s real mom is. I simply reply that that would be me and it sounds like they are asking who her biological mom is. The gentle redirect and education are usually all it takes to bring about respect and clarity. But I have to admit it always surprises me a little when they ask things like that. I mean, they don’t know her, it has no impact on their relationship with my daughter and they have no need to know that personal information. I’ve had it easy compared to many adoptive moms out there because my kids look and act so much like me that unless someone already knows they would never guess or just ask about their adoptions. In fact, it only came up again recently because my daughter introduced her birthmom to her friends this past week when she was visiting us. It brought her discussions and answers about being adopted into a new and tangible light. But for any adoptive parent this “real” concept is at the top of the list of wishes for a more understanding and accepting world.

You see, one of the biggest misconceptions out there is that adoptive parents are not a child’s real parents. This is frustrating at multiple levels. I mean, first the very word denotes that if I’m not real I must be fake, or virtual as well as my entire experience as a parent. That’s a bit demeaning by itself. But worse is how it sends the message that an adoptive parent is second rate or they are somehow temporary or substituting in their role as parent. This would make anyone feel uncomfortable and a bit defensive, but when you consider how much the adoptive parent gives to both make an adoption happen and further commits to the lifetime care and love of a child, well you can see why it’s a big deal.

So to my daughter’s friends I share yet again that I am in every wit my daughter’s REAL mom. She knows it, I know it and I hope one day you’ll finally know it for yourselves too. I’ve said it before, but just like a legalized piece of paper and service performed by the right person can make your mom and dad a husband and wife, the same process can make me my daughter’s mom - legally, binding and very much for real. It makes us as related as a family as your parents the day they got married. And any mom out there knows she’s a real mom the first time she stays up all night with a sick child and every time she wipes away a tear, sheds a tear and helps that child learn and grow. And that my friends is far more important than any legal element. Oh yes, it’s very real.

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