These flowers are all wild in Island Park, Idaho!

I was browsing the $5 value DVDs yesterday with my daughter and came across a copy of Footloose. Just seeing the cover made me giggle. If I’m not mistaken, the soundtrack to this movie was the first tape of “our” music at my home growing up. It wasn’t mine, it was my older sisters but it was like a rite of passage which is probably why I remember it. My daughter saw my distraction and asked what was up so I told her this movie just brought back a lot of memories for me. She asked what it was about and I told her basically it was about a boy who finds himself in a tiny town kicking back against the rules. The message that stands out the most in my mind from the show is the argument he uses against the preacher that there is a time and a season for everything, even dancing.

This is a message I’d like to get across to my children and the teens I work with. I’d like to really get them to see that there is a time for everything. It’s part of why I’m so passionate about charm school which focuses on this through decorum. To really understand this concept is to master self control and self-discipline. This is so important in a world that is screaming instant gratification all the time.

When I was recently asked to start teaching some charm school classes again, I began to form my own outline of the materials and knowledge I’ve acquired over the years. I broke it down into three basic keys that will unlock potential and open doors to really acquiring and mastering the art of charm. My three include:

1) Self Concept: Know Thyself
2) Appearance: The Power of Image
3) Social Interaction: Conquer or Crumble

As I compiled the list and organized some of my materials I realized again how critical the truth of everything having a time and season is. Now that I’ve had some personal experience in life I’m better able to compile these courses and their materials, things that I wouldn’t have been able to do as well a couple of decades ago. And so the story goes with so many things in my life, there is indeed a right time and season to many of life’s experiences. Figuring out what those are for you and not messing up the time line will result in greater happiness.

A good exercise for me was taking these three keys and applying the principle of times and seasons. For example, my level of self confidence is a direct reflection of my life’s experiences to date. Learning how to put them into perspective really helps me get a handle on who I am, how I feel about myself and what I want to become. And take appearance lessons: When I was a teenybopper it was in style to wear lots of layers, pushed up collars, leg warmers and big airings. It was the right time to wear such styles because that was the current trend, but if I tried to resurrect that appearance today it would be quite catastrophic. Equally valuable is the lesson that some clothing simply looks better on the young bodies it was designed for. And finally, there’s the social interaction piece where all these things come together. Think of all those movies or times when the awkwardness between an adult and teen were palpable because the parent or teacher was trying to be hip using current teen jargon.

There’s simply a time and season for everything. Instead of wishing for the good things from yesteryear, we should be embracing our current time and season growing and developing those appropriate traits and skills for where we are now. I guarantee you that down the road we’ll be looking back on where we are now the same way we do on our teen years. I don’t know about you, but I’d like to be able to look back and smile.

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It’s high time I got behind my husband on his new employment venture. He started working for Seth at Squidoo last month. I’ve been meaning to get around to checking the site out and creating a lens myself but it kept slipping on the task list. He sent me a gentle reminder link with tips on creating a great lens today so I jumped in and got it done.

Charm School 101 Just click and share your thoughts!

I have to give a shout out to all the team at Squidoo because it really is a fun site and people are having fantastic success with it. Whether you’re trying to drive more traffic to your blog, make some extra cash or just have fun learning and sharing expertise Squidoo is the place to be.

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This morning I had another reminder about the impact appearance has on a situation. It’s not new news to me but it’s always amazing to me to realize just how big a difference it can make.

Here’s the thing, how we feel is directly related to how we look. The things we do each day and more importantly how we do them are directly related to how we feel. Therefore how we look becomes a fundamental part of our outcome. If we feel frumpy, we will act frumpy and perform frumpy. In turn if we feel confident, we will act confident and perform with confidence. I often find the times when I feel the least like dressing up or making myself look nice are the times I need it most.

When you understand the power that comes from simple things related to your dress and appearance you’ll never put yourself in a situation where give that power away or ignore it. As a poise and charm coach I’ve taught several classes on basics from coordinating clothing to hairstyling to little tricks like using the power of color to your advantage or how to count points to know if you’re over or under dressed. But here’s the basic equation: if you want to feel _____ you need to do all you can to make yourself look _____. You can fill in the blank for whatever emotion or style fits your circumstance.

This morning, I found myself trapped between needing to be available for an important phone call and needing to get showered and ready for the day. (I know, if I could pull my mattress over mind backside out of bed at 6 AM the problem would be solved, but I’m not an early riser. It’s all I can do some mornings to be dressed with teeth brushed and out the door by 7:30 AM to get my son to school on time!) So when I got home just after 8 AM this morning I was stuck. All I knew was the call was expected “first thing in the morning.” Now, you all know how this waiting game can go. It’s like waiting for the cable guy or service repairman; a game of Russian Roullete. You may luck out and have it hit early in the time window or you may waste a lot of time waiting to the bitter end. As I pondered on things I realized that I would also need to be armed with professionalism and confidence in my conversation, therefore I really couldn’t afford to sit around with only my teeth brushed waiting. Further, if the gamble ended up pushing to the later limit I’d still be in this position when it’s time to pick my son up from school - that won’t work! So I prepared myself for the worst keeping the phone right by my side and hoping it didn’t come down to me figuring out how to answer it with soap in my hair. Fate was on my side this morning.

When I looked in the mirror and realized how much better I felt about everything and the impact it would have on my expected conversation I was supremely grateful I’d made the decision I did. I remembered reading some advice once for stay at home moms that the first thing they should do every day is get themselves dressed and ready right down to their shoes. Some women argued this because if you’re not going anywhere or only doing housework why bother? That’s the very point…with that attitude everything in your life will reflect a why bother quality.

So harness that power and use it to your advantage. Dress yourself and appearance for whatever strength/help you need most and you’ll be amazed at what that little step will do for you.

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Well, you may have noticed some new changes to my blog! With my hubby’s help my new navigation bar is up. There are still a few weird IE browser things but in general it’s working great. I’ve been busy finishing the tail end of some of my organization tasks in relation to the new navigation options and figure as long as we’re experimenting let’s add one more. *wink*

A short while ago I signed up to become an Independent Avon Representative. The reason was purely personal. My mom used to sell it when I was a girl and there are a few products I enjoyed and would buy if available. The problem is that most representatives are too gung ho or too flaky. Then as fate would have it I actually had a few people in the past couple months ask me if I sell it. So I decided to at least inquire about it. I figured if I could get my hands on it easy and get a price break as well all the better right? Talk about your no-brainer. There was a $10.00 sign up fee. No inventory requirements, no big sign up fee - benefits of a HUGE empire business. So I signed up. *smile*

The best part is that I can have my own website making it possible for anyone to order anytime. For anyone interested, the link is www.youravon.com/hschwendiman. So here’s the experiment. Now that I have a page on my blog specific to beauty stuff I’m going to incorporate a few things with articles when and as they fit. I’m going to try to link back to the specific item on my website. I’d love some feedback to know if anyone runs into problems with this as well as if it works the way I hope it will. For example, one product I’ve really fallen in love with is a foot file. Living in a climate where socks and shoes are a rare item indeed, I’m more conscious about my bare feet. And it only takes a short time in a warm climate to realize how quickly the heels of your feet can become dry and ugly! This little guy works like a charm. I added him into the end of my bath and in a few minutes easily worked away all the dead, rough and calloused skin. It immediately looked and felt better. I put on some lotion before bed and they felt as good as new. As a cosmetologist who has both given pedicures and tried many products in the past, I was truly impressed with my $5.00 purchase for both items. Not only is it a fraction of the cost of a full pedicure, it was a huge time saver to boot! Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about a long foot massage especially if I’m on the receiving end, but this busy mom is lucky to get a few minutes to herself for a bath these days so I appreciate making the most of my minutes. *grin*

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